What To Do When Your Creative Spirit Guide Empowers You @ Midnight & Asks Why Can't You Dream BIG?

I thought I was being responsible by checking into bed early before 9pm. I had worked all day at the lap top with clients and doing my own research work. I really needed the shut eye. My eyes had been feeling like heavy weights all day. I don't drink coffee, I avoid alcohol (wine doesn't count) and I try to stay clear of sugar as much as possible. Sushi for dinner a few hours before bed. No issue. No wine on this occasion. Unfortunately. It's going to be a good sleep I tell myself. Wrong.

Someone has other plans for me. As I lay there tossing and turning trying to find the most comfortable side to sleep on. Always coming back to the realisation that my back is the most comfortable position. Like it's some new discovery or something. I go through it every night. Insanity is the definition of doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. Just stay on your back, Renee and don't move! and so it begins. Relax, Renee. I concentrate on my breathing. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. This is my usual relaxation trick that usually is successful in taking me off to Never Land. Where I can dream of a place where growing up is unimaginable and where money is not necessary. I continue to toss and turn and turn and toss. I prefer the sound of the wind to stream through my window softly sweeping me off to my dream state but my partner tells me he cant sleep with the window open.

The creative alarm starts sounding it's bells in my mind. "Here we go" I tell myself.

As I lay next to my sleeping Beau. I could not stop the inspiration flowing through me. My spirit guides telling me to write the book. "I will" I tell them. Tomorrow I will start planning for it, I decide. I politely ask my guides if we can talk about this tomorrow. "Please I really am tired and need some sleep". Another tidal wave glitter mind bomb hits me....My inner goddess asks "Remember that time that lady you worked with told you she could travel into other peoples dreams when she slept? She told you she can take people on flights with dragons and go swimming with dolphins. Remember how you wondered why you don't dream in that kind of way? Remember when she told you she had been given a message that you need to look into who the Toltec's were?" I reply to myself, "Yes, I remember looking into them. I discovered they were an ancient civilisation in Mexico before the Aztec;s that were seen as the artisans that preserved and passed on wisdom and culture. Yes, I answered I know what your getting at. I will do it. I will do it tomorrow." She doesn’t stop. "Do you remember all the lessons in your life Renee. Every internal battle you faced. Every struggle you faced when situations were out of your control? Renee, remember what those hard times taught you? Renee, do you remember your biggest teachers, mentors, supporters and cheer leaders? Renee, do you remember when you forgot about me? Renee, do you remember how you thought I had died? Renee, do you remember how you found me again? Renee, you must remember all of it and find a way to share it!" I feel like a Atreyu in A Never Ending Story! Ok, I'll do it! Let's fly Falkor! I am wide awake now. "Yes, I answer. I do  remember and it's as if I start to write the first chapter in my mind. She wont let me start tomorrow and I know it.  I’m all over it. The words flow freely through my mind and I know I need to hop up out of bed and start typing it out. I have heard her and she has something to say. I begin to channel all of her wisdom as she guides me through what needs to be said. My spirit guides are more determined then me and they won’t let me sleep when they feel unheard. I pray to god to help me find the courage to write this book. To publish it. To market it. I know I am not afraid of writing a book. That is the easy part. It is the self doubt I look forward to doing battle with on the dance floor. 

I find myself playing the comparison game. I want to follow down the same paths as Melissa Ambrosini, Emma Mildon and Cassie Mendoza Jones. Three young women who have recently been blazing a trail for me to follow. Three brave women who faced themselves to find the power to express something that was bigger than who they were as individuals. They were not experts and they still are not experts in their field of focus. They simply had the courage to ask a question and they went on a journey to find the answers for themselves and put in the effort to make their dream a reality. They have become champions because of their commitment and drive to share their findings with the world.  

 So, what’s my question then?

What is my quest at this stage in my life? My inner goddess whispers to me and tells me to remember the post I put up on Instagram today. I answer, yes. She gently remind's me, "Renee, you wrote about how you have noticed how difficult it is to dream big when you have self-limiting beliefs. Why don’t you write about that?" Lately I have been contemplating the people I have met in my life. Not many had big dreams and if they did they didn't share them with me. Why is that? If you don’t have people around you that dream big how can you learn how to use your imagination and overcome your own fears. If you don’t have people who even set goals in their lives how likely will you be to set goals? How will you know what it feels like to achieve? To win? To feel success in whatever it is you want in life? Success in all forms of life? I have always been a Dreamer. A High Achiever. An Advocate.  A Creative. Yet I still have not fully harnessed my limitless potential to dream! And I  feel a little pissed off about that. As a community are we not responsible for helping our children realise their full potential?

Instead we wait in shopping centre lines listening to parents who consistently criticise their children for laughing, for playing, for caring, for wanting, for asking, for being creative, for being them SELF. And every time I watch for the joy to fade away from the child's eyes. All in the name of Control, Obedience, Conformity. The sickness. The domestication of the human spirit. The annihilation of your inner wild heart. And so the cancer spreads to drown the dreams of the young and breed the fear into the hearts of our babies who will not learn to take steps on their own but to ask for permission to even try. A civilisation that instead of asking questions and seeking out answers will not have the cognitive ability to do anything else but to do as their told because "they" told you to. Don't you dare speak your mind or be your SELF or you run the risk of the wrath. The social wrath from those who don't know any better. 

I have had clients who do not know how to even comprehend the idea of limitless potential, abundance, financial freedom, intelligence, resources. I ask them questions like "If you had it all what would your life look like? What excites you? What gives you pleasure?" And the looks are devastating as they search their imaginations to find a dark empty room. Is it possible that the status-quo are seriously suffering from a developmental delay in imagination? Here we are teaching people about the power of attraction. Like attracts like but if you can't imagine anything more than what is already in front of you? What hope is there? Are we so distracted that we have lost our abilities to vision an existence outside of our reality?  Has society created an environment that is so disconnected from SELF and opportunity that people have managed to create self imposed prisons they call a "life"? Food for thought as I work through the process of blogging out my ideas.

So my inner wild child wins as now I am up at 11:30pm writing this blog. She then thinks it’s funny to remind me of this quote. “Great things begin to happen when sleeping women wake”. Cheers to my lovely SELF. You’re a comedian and now I am going back to sleep. I am grateful for your motivation but we need to work on a more convenient schedule.

Renee Marie Simpson

Did you know there are many different forms of Meditation?

Are you not into the idea of sitting still for fifteen minutes? 

Then this 'live gig' style of meditation might be for you! I checked out "The Mantra Room" last night to learn about 'Kirtan.'

As an interfaith believer I appreciate the common thread that runs throughout all belief systems and human hearts which is the pursuit of happiness and unconditional love. I am always on the path to exploring and discovering different approaches to healing. I love it!

My long time friend Justin Stafford told me about the wonderful healing he experiences through the power of chant. I looked for a group in my area and so discovered "The Mantra Room" at West End, Brisbane. The Mantra Room offers 'Kirtan' three nights a week to the public for a donation of $5 which includes entry, a great performance, a fun, dynamic, group meditation and a yummy healthy vegetarian meal!

I like to travel solo to these sorts of events most of the time to maintain my open presence to new experiences and new people. So if you feel like you might have to convince someone to go with you. Just go solo. You will have more fun! 

When I arrived I was greeted warmly. I paid my donation into a wooden box on the wall. I took my thongs off at the door like everyone else. I picked up a cushion and sat down the front so I could have a good view of the band. Most people chose to seat themselves in chairs. The band played soft, melodic, songs where the singers would sing the verses and the group would sing it back. Some songs went for up to 30 minutes! I felt very safe, warm, confident and comfortable sitting with a group of strangers singing songs I had never heard before. I sang with all my heart and even got up and had a dance after watching half the group join in. I felt zero judgement of others and best of all I felt no self judgement. After two hours of exercising my diaphragm as well as my body I joined the group for a healthy vegetarian meal.

I knew I connected with the Lead Singer as she performed. She came and sat with me and introduced herself as Gayatri and asked if she could join me for dinner. She was a lovely lady who happens to be an important person at the Centre. I was curious about this Australian Woman with an Indian name and a belief that originated in India if she has lived in India. She told me she had never been even after she had been offered free trip to go. She explained she felt her belief in her heart and didn't feel the need. I spoke about my experience of India and how I had been searching for a spiritual experience over there but did not find it. We laughed.

She spoke about her struggle with confidence after experiencing a leg reconstruction returning to teaching yoga and singing in the band. I met two lovely yoga instructor's who also began to join in on the topic of confidence and how it felt to start out teaching yoga classes. How refreshing it was to meet these women in their 50's discussing their anxiety as leaders. Even more refreshing it was to observe no one trying to force feed any particular right way vision on to anyone or have me sign up to anything. I thanked the ladies for having me and for the wonderful food and company and wished them a great week.

I left feeling accepted and praised from the inside out. I drove home with a smile on my face noticing the mind, body, spirit of nourishment. I would highly recommend trying 'Kirtan' to anyone looking for a dynamic, social meditation experience.

If you feel fear or other people's fear (fear of the uncertain or of others opinions) holding you back. Just remember you are in control of your choices. No one can make you do anything. It is your journey to seek out your own answers. Namaste. 

ttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UnzuPuqyqkc&sns=fb

Who the Frick is this "Wild Woman?"

Do you know you were born to be wild? Yes!! I am talking about the crazy eyes kinda wild! The kind of wild, which drives you to live life on the edge.  That inspires you to take huge risks! To chase that feeling of love because you know the lessons will be so worth it! That encourages you to dive face first down plummeting into the darkest depths of your soul.  I mean the kind of wild that is so unique, so damn fearless and free!  The kind of wild that frightens off predators that they run away and hide! The type of wild that doesn’t give a shit about what anyone else has to say or thinks about them! This kind of wild howls at the full moon every month! The kind of wild that is real, raw and honest! It’s the kind that screams in your face, “This is who I am and if you don’t like it! Go................!"(You can fill in the blank).

Well, you get the message right!

This week I’m going to invite you on an epic adventure! Where together, we will explore the mysteries of the wild woman! I will take you on a guided tour of this beautiful sacred mountain. It is on this mountain you will soon discover someone pretty special. She lives in a cave high up on the mountain all on her own. This someone you might even start to recognize.  On the way there, we will make a few short stops at some mind blowing sights that will show you exactly when and how this wild woman became a prisoner in her cave.  It is on the way there, that you will discover the ancient sacred secret on how YOU can rescue her! Yes, you can!

So let’s get started! It kills me every day to hear so many of my young clients saying things like, “I can’t afford”, “I can’t leave”, “I’m not good enough”, “I couldn’t be bothered”, ”I can’t control it”, “Why me?”. These sentences expressed verbally or as self-talk are the cries of the domesticated, the sad songs of the tame, the screams of the imprisoned wild woman. It is the fact that no one is taking notice of her, listening to her calls out for help, coming to her rescue that she is now becoming very, very, very sick!

But the first thing you should know is how she came to live up here. So, let’s have a look for it shall we! It’s a bit dark on the mountain so let’s stick together!

OK, there it is! See it! Let’s stop here.

When you were born your beautiful innocent mind was a blank slate. Crystal clear like water gushing down a waterfall. Green and fresh like the rain forest in early spring. Bright with unconditional trust and love like an island sunrise. Your nature was to be kind to everyone and most importantly you were kind to yourself. You were the embodiment of a true wild nature. You didn’t have a care in the world, no negative thoughts, no self-limiting beliefs, you had peace of mind. You were born a true wild child. You were born to be unique. You were born to be fearless.  You were born to be free. I want to show you that this wild child is still very much alive inside of you.  She has now grown into a beautiful young woman and she desperately wants to run free with you so you can be happy and live life at your full potential as one!  

I am so glad the moon is out to guide us tonight! It really helps illuminate these beautiful places! OK let’s head up the path a bit further to our next stop!  

I want to remind you of something first; your inner wild child has always been with you. She has never left you. Remember the times when you liked to have fun, when you enjoyed playing,  laughing, having a good cry, when you said sorry, when you made new friends, when you explored, when you made discoveries,  when you learnt new things, when you spoke up for yourself, when you asked for help, when you told others what you need. That was her! That was your true wildest heart running free! You were fearless in those moments! Come on! I’m sure you can remember!  Yes, there they are! So many beautiful memories of how wild you REALLY are!

OK, let’s try jumping over this now and see what’s on the other side! Ah yes, right this way! It's OK to jump. I've got you! Can you see were we are? We have arrived at the real story of what happened to your inner wild child for her to end up here! 

Did you know that fear slowly creeps in at around age five and it actually starts from the messages we receive in our childhood? Starting with our caregivers, then every important person in our lives would soon start to impart their ideas on what we should fear, the media, TV and advertising do a great job of this, our teachers, our peers, our workplaces and our experiences start to shape all the things we would eventually fear as adults. I call these fear messages “Wild Woman Poison Ivy.” It’s our relationship with fear that actually predetermines what choices we make in our lives. It’s actually quite remarkable how she has managed to survive so long up here with so much wild woman poison ivy you digest every day!

Which brings us to the final stop on our adventure to the top of the mountain. It is here you will see the sacred cave where she lives!

Many women just like her have just been barely surviving, some simply existing, on auto pilot, completely unaware of the power they possess, their wild dreams locked away, their true voices silenced, their strength forgotten.  It’s our responsibility as sisters to remind each other of our true nature! Because you might not realize it now but your happiness is kind of a pretty big deal! It’s time to make the journey my beautiful sister to liberate her! Because your dreams can only be achieved when you find the courage to take action to free your inner wild woman!

She is calling you. Will you answer her call? I believe in you but do you believe in your self?

 When you’re ready to be your own heroine give me a call. Loads of Love to you!

WHAT THe FRICK is a "SISTER CIRCLE"?????

Good Question! I'm glad you asked!

But before i get into that! I need to tell you how I came to find them,  and to do that I need to take you on a crazy weird adventure back in time. Come with me and step into my time machine (which is super cool BTW. Bright pink and purple polka dots and loads of on point music to keep us entertained on our way there! Here we are, back at Wyong High School .Yes I admit it. I went to school in the Bronx! Hey, this girl knows where she comes from and represents! Damn Straight! (I would have entered a weird peace sign hand emoticon thing but I have no idea how to do that! Technology! Wait for me!) Anyway, High School. The smell of rubbish, girl's impulse deodorant and boys body odor or was it their feet. Gross. My school days were the same as yours I'm sure. The bitchy girls you cant stand so you move to the boys hang to avoid them, the annoying teachers with their expectations and rules, "Renee, where is your uniform?" I would nervously handover the fake note i wrote earlier in the morning whilst mum was still asleep. I'd stand nervously in my jeans and school jersey with my outstanding polka face.  (Totally worked for 6 months til i got busted after they called my mum to find out why my school skirt had been dirty for 6 months. Forgery lesson learnt early, tick that box.) I had the bully experience too. "Renee Simpson is a SLUT" was splashed over the school toilets. They did such a great job too that there was actually no space for me to write a reply. Not fair really. The school wasn't happy because they had to pay to have someone repaint the toilets after that! For the record I was only 13 at the time so what they wrote was not in fact true! Yes, I had the fights, the punch up's, the death notes handed to me in class, the car crash, the parties, the after school job, rad teaches, means ones too, a mum and dad that didn't get me or the fact i just liked reading, listening to music, talking to my friends on the phone and writing in my journal. Guess what! They took my door off the hinges and accused me of being anti social! Seriously, that's what they did. Quite simply, I had enough on my plate with boys i liked, friends, homework, not being allowed to do what i wanted and I did not wish to spend my time arguing about how my skirt was too short, the pimples they felt the need to point out, my choice of friends, their hick ideas about asylum seekers, indigenous people, asians, same sex relationships, the environment and which bat man movie came out first. Go away! For the record, over the years i did wear them down and they are much more open minded about things now. You put your gay friends in front them one day and they quickly learn to be accepting. Winning! So, Where was I? Yes, so i was the black sheep, the weirdo, I was too deep, I was too skinny, I could talk under water, I was outrageous, I spoke up for my rights, I was too emotional, I smoked in the school car park, I was everybody's friend, I had the boyfriend,  I had one best friend, I was smart (but until year 10 you have to pretend your not then you don't give a s#*t what anyone thinks of you. Then you just buckle down and get the hell out of there so you can start REALLY having a good time and start making some ACTUAL good friends and all on your own terms!!) Independence is the best! But something was always missing. I felt different. Alone. Bored. Like i didn't feel comfortable being myself with ANYONE. i wasn't sure what it was. I finished High School and got lost for a few years (experimented  with drugs, partied four days a week, worked a few jobs, had loads of sickies and went to TAFE). I went over seas for a couple of years and did the same thing over there. Partied, made friends and had a look around. Loved it. I had a great time! I came back, only after i received the tragic news my brother had died. He was 16 years old. I was lost and fell into a dark place that took me years to crawl out of. Not a pretty sight really and not something i like to talk about. A "perfect mess" I was once described as. I was stuck in this downward spiral and i was drowning fast. So after the intervention. Oh yes, there was an intervention. I made a truce i would take better care of myself and I would find a way to feel happy again.

I met a cool lady three months later on work placement who  sparked my interest. She was an old hippy lady and she told me about women's circles. I went straight home and googled what the Frick is a women's circle.

I discovered throughout history, “Women’s Circles” have been banned, concealed, forbidden and remained underground for hundreds of years because men started to fear the power of women coming together as a collective! And only in recent years have women started to bring back the old tradition of circle gatherings.

It sounded perfect! I had just started on my crazy self help reading journey about how to find true happiness  (which I've been on for 7 years now.) I was raring to go, excited to enter this new mysterious world. I discovered you had to be an insider to even hear about these circles. They were a secret. A place off limits to outsiders. I was lucky enough at age 24 to be invited by an insider! 

 I was a bit freaked out to start with. There was crystals, incense burning, the leader hugged me which made me feel really loved straight away, all the ladies there were really nice to me,  and many different women from all walks of life, we talked about where we were at in life and anything that was bothering us in our lives. I thought this is great! Finally women i can talk to and i can just be myself and not judged or criticized and no one tries to rescue me or tell me what to do. I could just speak and be accepted! The only thing i noticed was I was the youngest. Between 20 - 40 years younger then the next which made me feel a little uncomfortable about sharing the fact my issue was with an ex boyfriend at the time who had tried to make out with my friend whilst we were at a party or the fact i kept experiencing black outs as a result of heavy drinking because that was my means of coping with it (Yep, i told you. A downward spiral). When i stared at the cute old lady sitting in front of me talking about how she was feeling about losing her mobility. I thought. Awkies. Not saying anything about whats really going on for me. Instead I chose to talk about a fight i had with my mum which I thought was much more suited to the audience. Awkward moment avoided. 

But what I noticed after the circle was this miracle. This transformation. This remarkable sensation which i can not put into words. This tremendous sense of self worth. I felt grateful and honored to be alive. I had direction and purpose. I had this confidence I had never felt before. I stopped fighting myself and everyone else. This was the power of the circle! And let's just say I never looked back! 

5 years later and loads of circle experience and a solid successful career working in the youth sector. I have decided to blow the lid on women's circles and share the secrets with our young girls too. This is how i founded Born2BWILD with the vision to start "Sister Circles" all around the world! A safe place for our young girls to go to share and feel accepted, loved, heard and celebrated without judgement or criticism. A magical place for them to have a laugh, feel normal, inspire them to take ownership and avoid the isolation that plagues this stage of their lives!

If  you would like to learn about the magic, secret "Sister Circles". Please join us today! 

Loads of love to you all!

Renee xxx